This mockumentary explores the many different types of a modern family through the stories of a gay couple, comprised of Mitchell and Cameron, and their daughter Lily, a straight couple, comprised of Phil and Claire, and their three kids, Haley, Alex, and Luke, and a multi-ethnic couple, which is comprised of Jay and Gloria, and her son Manny.
Phil takes Jay on an unconventional fishing trip; Gloria wonders how to break the news about her pregnancy; Dylan temporarily moves in with the Dunphys; Cam and Mitch think about adopting a cat.
Claire and Phil embarrass Haley when they drop her off at college; Manny makes Gloria and Jay take a class; Lily gets into a tussle on her first day of kindergarten.
Phil gets a vasectomy; Gloria and Jay can’t agree on whether or not they should find out the sex of the baby; Mitchell tries to steer Cameron toward getting a part-time job.
Phil can’t accept that Luke wants to quit magic; Gloria’s snoring keeps Jay and Manny awake; Mitch and Cam struggle to deal with their reversed role.
Claire must rein in her enthusiasm for Halloween and keep her celebration kid-friendly; Phil decides to hold an open house on Halloween; Mitch and Cam have a costume party; Gloria’s hormones make her more quick-tempered than usual.
Jay and Gloria host a yard sale to help with a school fundraiser; Mitch and Cam vet Alex’s new friend; Manny finds a trunk full of secrets.
Cameron watches Alex and Luke while Phil, Claire and Mitchell deal with Haley’s arrest. Jay tries to cut short a surprise visit from ex-wife Dede (Shelley Long), so she doesn’t learn about Gloria’s pregnancy.
When Claire, Manny and Luke go to Alex’s academic decathlon for the weekend, Phil throws a guys’ night at home; Manny and Luke crash bar mitzvahs looking for a girl; Cam and Mitchell get Jay and Gloria a surprise baby gift.
Mitch and Cam try to save an old tree in the park; Jay takes Manny to a kid’s Olympics-themed birthday party; Gloria and Claire have an eventful shopping trip.
When Manny and Luke’s Little League team makes it to the playoffs, Claire and Cameron search for a field to use; Gloria uses a microphone to sing to the baby.
Jay and the family plan to celebrate New Year’s together at a hotel in Palm Springs, but the hotel doesn’t meet their expectations; Alex and Haley are faced with challenges as they try to watch the kids back at home.
Gloria and Jay try to make Manny’s 14th birthday extra special by planning a surprise party; Haley starts hanging out with a much older guy.
When Gloria’s mother and sister visit, they bring traditions, baby names and family baggage; Phil helps the kids with their problems; Mitchell and Cameron try to correct Lily’s bad habits.
When the lead in the school’s production of “Phantom of the Opera” gets sick, Manny is willing to do anything to land the lead; Phil and Jay wind up in a golf-off with Mitch and Pepper; Gloria and Alex visit a psychic.
Claire and Phil’s Valentine’s Day romp ends with Claire in the hospital; Jay and Gloria’s attempts at romance are interrupted by the kids; after hosting a wild party, Cam and Mitch are left with hangovers and a new housemate.
Things get awkward when Phil shows up at Claire’s college reunion; Jay is fixated on winning a big bowling tournament; a wig malfunction during an elaborate photo shoot with Joe leads to unfortunate results.
Mitch and Cam’s friend Sal announces she’s getting married the next day and they are in the wedding; Gloria doesn’t trust her new nanny; Claire bonds with Haley; Phil helps Luke with a girl.
Claire and Cam bring in a third party (Wendi McLendon-Covey) when they reach an impasse on a landscaping decision; Phil teaches basic fix-it skills to the kids; Mitch helps Lily with a bully.
At the hospital Claire and Phil see the older version of their family; Mitchell and Cameron plan a day for Lily and Gloria; Manny and Jay go to a private school to look around.
Phil gets desperate when Cam and Claire’s flipped house is more difficult to sell than expected; Javier brings his new girlfriend along to visit Manny.
Phil is jazzed to share the wonders of residential real estate with Luke and Manny’s classmates for career day. Gloria challenges Jay’s claims of always wanting to become a novelist. Mitch and Cam make a costly mistake while executing tooth fairy duties.
Mitch’s ex-boyfriend, a personable and successful doctor, invites the whole family to a fundraising event at a roller rink; Phil teaches Gloria how to skate; Haley helps Alex talk to boys.
Phil gets a new RV for a fun family road trip. Jay and Gloria search for Manny’s backpack. Lily’s gymnastics meet brings out Cam and Mitch’s competitive spirit.
Everyone flies down to Florida to be with Phil after his mom’s passing. Claire helps Phil with Gracie’s last wish for Frank, and the kids reflect on the gifts grandma left for them. Gloria has to contend with an outstanding arrest warrant in Florida, Cam finds himself fitting right into an elderly women’s group at Frank’s retirement community, and Jay runs into a pivotal person from his past.
Phil finally agrees to sell the old station wagon but only after a family trip down memory lane; Cameron asks Jay for help when Mitchell decides to build a life-size princess castle for Lily.
Gloria decides to honor her late grandmother by cooking more traditional Colombian meals; Claire finds out Alex is interested in a boy; Mitchell's aversion to public displays of affection causes an argument.
When an earthquake hits, Claire gets stuck in the bathroom with the plumber, Manny experiences an existential crisis while out with Jay, and Mitchell and Cameron use it as an excuse to get out of attending a party.
Claire tries to convince Phil that his realtors' banquet speech is unfunny. Mitchell tries to convince Cameron to change his wardrobe. Jay and Gloria go to a quinceañera hosted by one of his employees. Haley gives Alex advice on how to be cool.
In an attempt to reconnect the family, Phil and Claire challenge them to see who can abstain from using their electronic devices the longest. Mitchell and Cameron attempt to get Lilly into the best pre-school. Gloria deals with the neighbor's barking dog.
Claire gives each family member a role to play in spookifying the Dunphy house for Halloween, but Cameron hates Halloween due to a traumatic childhood experience. Mitchell had a terrible day at work, and Gloria acts weird after Jay and Manny tease her about her accent.
Claire and Haley are stuck at home sick. Gloria and Manny's surprise visit at work causes a headaches for Jay. Cameron is swept up by all the lights and cameras when he goes behind Mitchell's back and takes Lily for a commercial.
Manny is depressed about his birthday. Phil and Claire engage in a not-so-friendly car race on the way to the party, and Mitch and Cam get sidetracked when they stop at the mall to pick up a gift.
Mitchell tries to tell Cameron how he feels uncomfortable with his mom, Barb Tucker. Haley breaks up with Dylan to Phil's dismay and Claire's delight. Jay has a little stomach ache that gets exacerbated when he and Manny look it up on the Internet.
At Luke and Manny's first school dance, Jay and Phil take them to the mall which turns disastrous, Claire's is jealous when Gloria joins the school dance committee. Cameron and Mitchell learn about Lily biting other kids at the playground.
Claire becomes a vigilante to catch a car that speeds though their streets. Phil tries to land an important listing with a difficult client, Jay teaches Manny (and Gloria) how to ride a bike. Mitchell and Cameron meet a mysterious neighbor who is quite the charmer.
Phil and Claire pressure Alex to ease back on her school work, but begin to worry about their own intellectual drives. Jay is upset when Gloria tries to befriend a new couple, and Mitchell runs into an old female flame.
The kids get a surprise of their own when they take breakfast in bed to Phil and Claire on their anniversary. Jay and Gloria's Vegas vacation plans are ruined by a brutally honest email accidentally sent to Claire,. Mitchell and Cam try to get into a new restaurant owned by a mom at Lily's preschool.
Claire and Phil decide to reprise their role-playing adventure from last year's Valentine's Day. Jay's surprise plans for Gloria keeps getting interrupted. A secret admirer comes between Cameron and Mitchell.
Claire and Cameron are dismayed by the guest list for Lily's princess-themed birthday party. Then DeDe attends with Claire's old high school boyfriend in tow. Jay and Gloria turn to their own unique methods of dealing with this gathering of misfits.
After Phil and Claire have a huge fight, Gloria steps in to counsel Phil while Jay counsels Claire. Jay has some regret in buying Gloria a karaoke machine. Cameron is in full prep mode for a huge fund-raising event and asks Mitchell and Luke for help.
Claire is run ragged trying to fix Haley and Alex's relationship. Gloria is horrified by Jay's plans to purchase themselves side-by-side crypts. Cameron decides he wants to write a book that celebrates the fact that Lily is adopted, but soon learns something new.
Phil and Claire are not pleased when Luke befriends a curmudgeonly old neighbor. To avoid an invite to the symphony with Gloria and Manny, Jay goes with Mitchell and Cameron on their "boys' night out" while Haley babysits Lily.
Cameron is overzealous in his planning of the spring musical performance at Luke and Manny's school. Jay's brother visits while Phil convinces the family to be in his new ad.
Mitchell and Cameron assess their family members in trying to decide who would best take care of Lily should anything happen to them.
Claire and Gloria's Mother's Day excursion with the kids turns into the mother of all disasters. Meanwhile, Phil and Jay share an awkward moment when they stay home to prepare dinner for everyone. Cameron worries about gender roles in his relationship with Mitchell.
Jay advises a dog trainer, while Phil and Claire switch parenting duties to the kids' chagrin. Mitchell has an extra Lady Gaga ticket when Cameron ends up sick.
With the whole family gathered at Jay's before going to Alex's middle school graduation, Jay is hiding a botox mishap, Cameron is upset about Mitchell's habit of laughing at his expense, and Phil tries sympathetic and critical of Claire's worries over the kids growing up too fast that they might miss Alex's big moment.
Jay wants to go fishing on his birthday, but the family insists he have a big party, leading Claire and Mitchell to get trapped in their childhood yard, Phil encounters his college nemesis at the mall and Cameron to have trouble at the bakery.
While vacationing on Lost Creek Ranch, the three families try their hands at a little cattle herding, skeet shooting and horseback riding. There are also some big firsts, a huge surprise and an actual face-off between Jay and a cowboy named Hank.
Lily has problems with Mitchell and Cameron’s plans to adopt another child, Jay tries to get Manny to confess to stealing a locket at school, and Claire goes to extreme lengths to prove that she was right in an argument.
Jay’s relationship with the dog irritates Gloria. Phil and Luke try to master the tightrope. Cameron starts a juice fast.
Jay helps Manny with a school fundraiser. Claire petitions for a stop sign at a busy intersection. Phil and Luke try to create a viral video. Gloria searches for Stella.
Gloria tries to help Jay and Manny with their problems but both are unreceptive. Claire considers running against Councilman Duane Bailey. Cam and Mitch are the victims of a hit-and-run accident.
Phil takes Haley to visit his alma mater. Claire goes out with Mitchell and Cameron. Gloria and Jay may have to broach a delicate subject with Manny.
Gloria persuades Jay to commit to a night of salsa dancing after seeing how much his friend Shorty and his girlfriend do together. Cameron makes a bet that he can get a woman’s phone number at the bar. Phil builds a tree house for Luke.
The Pritchetts rally for a good cause after a neighbor’s house burns down, but there’s a downside when Jay throws out his back, Cameron takes on a moving truck, and some donated toys fall into the wrong hands.
An old neighborhood kid returning to town as a internet billionaire gets Phil thinking of what could have been. Jay feels Manny could use some constructive criticism, Cameron is offended when Mitchell questions the authenticity of his colorful childhood stories.
The family puts together a quick Christmas celebration when they realize they won’t be together on the actual day.
Phil contemplates the worst after missing a call from the doctor. Javier, Manny’s biological father, pays another visit to take his son to the horse races, Mitchell wins an environmental law award, creating a competition between Cam and himself on who has the better trophy. Gloria tutors Haley in Spanish.
Jay and Claire take control of their kids’ school projects from Manny and Luke, while Haley and Gloria help Phil with a real estate presentation. Cam and Mitchell meet with a potential birth mother.
Claire prepares for her debate with Duane Bailey. Mitch and Cam try to clean up Lily’s language before her turn as a flower girl. Jay blames Stella’s strange behavior on Gloria.
Phil’s preoccupation with a business opportunity blinds him to his new partner’s inappropriate behavior around Claire. Jay and Gloria may regret letting Mitchell and Cameron be their temporary house guests when their home is being fumigated.
Phil and Claire go overboard with drinks, and divulging personal information, on a night out to celebrate the sale of a house to Mitchell and Cameron’s friends.
It’s a day of disturbing realizations when Mitchell manages to ruin one of Jay’s proudest golf moments, Phil overhears something that may forever change how he sees his little girl, and Gloria stumbles upon Claire’s dangerous little secret.
Mitchell feels pressured to make Cameron’s birthday extra special. People start to question Jay’s manliness, and the girls interfere with Phil’s leap day plans.
Cameron is reunited with his estranged ex-clown partner, Lewis. Phil is serious about landing a very important listing, only to be trumped by a notorious bulldozer of an agent, Mitzi Roth. Manny has a cool new friend, which makes both Jay and Gloria suspicious.
Claire’s race for town council comes to a head on Election Day as the Dunphys make phone calls for votes and Mitchell and Cameron take to the streets to campaign, while the candidate endures technical problems during some last-minute interviews.
A visit from Cameron’s father features an awkward dinner for Jay and Gloria at Mitchell and Cameron’s house. Claire helps Luke face the death of an older neighbor, Phil and Alex have a father-daughter bonding experience. Haley throws a party without permission.
Phil buys a car without consulting Claire. Jay is on a mission to get to his high-school reunion with Gloria and Manny. Lily loses her favorite toy on a train.
When the family travels to Disneyland, Phil struggles to keep up with Luke, Claire is shocked when they run into Dylan, Jay and Gloria disagree about what are sensible shoes for the day, and Mitch and Cam must contain Lily’s new affinity for running.
Gloria and Jay bicker while trying to order lunch at a diner. Claire and Cam have different theories on how to discipline kids. Luke accepts an award under false pretenses. Phil has a hard time firing Mitchell from his temporary job at the real estate agency. The entire family participates in Alex’s living art display of Norman Rockwell’s Thanksgiving painting.
Gloria’s bilingualism comes in handy on Mitchell and Cameron’s quest to adopt another child. Meanwhile, Jay and Manny help Lily get ready for a dance recital. Alex goes to her first prom, and Haley announces her future plans, which come as a shock to her family.
Jay is having trouble keeping up with his new young Colombian wife and her son. Claire is having trouble with her husband Phil, who thinks he can be hip with their kids. Mitchell and his partner Cameron adopt a Vietnamese baby.
As Phil helps his son show Claire he can be trusted, Phil turns out to be the irresponsible one at the sight of a hot neighbor. Mitchell and Cameron take Lily to their Mommy & Me class. Manny and Jay uncomfortably spend time together.
Phil pushes Jay to go out with him and fly his new model plane. While Manny takes time out to play with Luke, Gloria accompanies Alex in shopping for a dress. Manny has a heart-to-heart talk with his sister Claire.
Claire and Mitchell's mother makes a surprise visit to make amends for what has been termed "the incident" at Jay and Gloria's wedding. Everything comes to a head when the whole family shows up to dinner at Claire's house.
A family barbecue gets uncomfortable for Gloria and Claire after an incident at school involving Manny and Luke.
Claire is happy to have the house to herself on the first day of school, but Phil does not share her enthusiasm.
The whole family comes out to support Manny's newfound interest - fencing. It turns out he's quite masterful in the sport, but Jay's proud enthusiasm triggers an old childhood wound for Mitchell. Meanwhile Phil is determined to find where Luke's hidden talents lie.
With a history of giving bad gifts, Claire is determined to surprise Phil with an amazing anniversary present: a private performance by one of their favorite musicians, Izzy LaFontaine (Edward Norton). However, it turns out to be unexpected in more ways than one. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Cameron call up their "party-girl bestie", Sal (Elizabeth Banks), for a long overdue night out on the town.
Nothing is too big when Phil and Claire decide to throw Luke the biggest and best birthday party a boy could ever want, but when Cameron shows up as Fizbo the Clown, it sets off a chain of events that ends with someone in the hospital.
The Dunphy kids are in trouble again, but this time Claire and Phil are threatening to take Christmas away. Gloria and Manny want to incorporate some of their Colombian practices into Jay's holiday traditions, but he wants to keep it his way. Meanwhile Cameron and Mitchell take Lily to the mall for her first picture with Santa, however this Santa isn't very jolly.
Gloria does not like Jay's reaction to the arrival of Manny's father; Phil is rushed to the hospital; Mitchell and Cameron try to sleep train Lily.
Mitchell plants the seed in Jay's head that he thinks one of Jay's old buddies might be secretly gay. Jay doesn't believe it for a second... except for all the questionable signs he now keeps noticing. Meanwhile Gloria gives Manny's date a makeover and Claire faces off with Phil's universal remote.
Claire is upset to find that her friend Valerie is better than her. In the meantime Mitchell helps Gloria with legal issues and Jay had a hard time in the locker room.
Phil and Claire break from their traditional Valentine's Day dinner date and plan a little "role play" excursion. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria's ideas of romance clash when he takes her to a comedy show, and Mitchell and Cameron play cupid for Manny.
Phil and Luke go into crawlspace under the house, Hayley takes her drivers test, Manny tries to get over his fear of roller coasters and Lily says "Mommy" which upsets Cameron and Mitchell.
Phil meets an old girlfriend on Facebook. Jay accidentally kills Manny's turtle. Mitchell tells his boss the truth.
Jay and Mitchell go on their traditional father-and-son outing to see the meteor showers, but Mitchell is upset when he finds out that Manny will be joining them. Cameron and Gloria spend some quality time together, with some minor incidents, while Phil and Claire both take on one of their child's school projects.
iPad release day falls on Phil's birthday, giving Claire an opportunity to finally score an ideal gift for her technophile husband. Manny and Gloria humor Jay—a sore loser at board games—by suppressing their superior chess skills. Mitchell questions his ability to protect his family, while crossed baby monitor signals compel Cameron to secretly intervene in the love life of a neighboring couple.
During an intense basketball game, Luke and Manny's coach quits, which leads to Jay and Phil stepping in to help out. Meanwhile, Mitchell helps Cameron find a prospective employer.
Claire is caught off guard when Phil's father shows up in an RV with a little four legged friend, and she becomes suspicious that he might be hiding a larger reason for the visit. Meanwhile, when Cameron hears Dylan is down a drummer in his band, he enthusiastically offers to fill in, and Jay and Gloria have to pay the consequences of accidentally taking Manny to see a traumatizing horror movie.
Jay's plans to do nothing but relax on vacation are interrupted by an unwelcome reality check. Meanwhile, Phil tries to make the trip romantic for Claire, Mitchell and Cameron disagree on whether they should go sight-seeing, and the kids get themselves into trouble.
Claire makes an effort to take a new family portrait, but everybody is too busy to cooperate: Gloria and Manny go with Phil and Alex to a Lakers game and share an awkward moment on the jumbotron, Cameron gets a job as a wedding singer while Mitchell takes care of Lilly and a stray pigeon, and Luke interviews Jay for a school project.
Phil and Claire try to orchestrate a kid-free week during Luke, Haley and Alex’s summer activities; Cam and Mitch try to have a memorable summer.
Luke and Manny have their first day of high school; Claire returns to the workforce; Mitch juggles an important meeting and Lily’s first day of grade one.
Phil’s job takes up a lot of his time; Luke has his friends over for a poker game; Gloria worries the baby is cursed; Cam hosts a funeral for the cat’s imaginary wife.
When Cam’s sister comes to visit, he tries to find a gentle way to break the news of his engagement; Phil and Claire decide to miss one of Luke’s games; Gloria is in denial about needing glasses.
The adults struggle to make it to a hot new restaurant in time for the reservation Jay pulled a lot of strings to get.
Jay and Manny oppose Gloria’s decision to hire a male nanny; Phil and Jay try to cheer up Frank; Mitch and Cam ask Pepper to help plan their wedding.
The family goes to the annual school fair; Phil and Claire each plan a separate surprise for their 20th wedding anniversary; Haley has an awkward encounter.
Claire encourages Jay to go to ClosetCon, where he is reunited with former colleagues; for the first time, Cam takes Lily and Mitch to the Tucker farm.
Cam is extremely focused – and ruthless – as a big football game approaches; Claire wants to prove herself at work; Phil tries to teach his children about optimism
Jay and Manny set out to cut down their own Christmas tree; Gloria is on edge when her mother visits; Mitchell does last-minute shopping to find the perfect gift for Lily.
Phil ends up in jail after tricking Luke into taking a dance class; Jay and Gloria plan birthday parties for Manny and Joe; Mitch and Cam try to book a wedding venue.
Gloria has an encounter with a mean mom (Jane Krakowski) during the high school open house; Mitchell meets a judgmental neighbor (Jesse Eisenberg); Alex goes to a therapist.
Haley turns the tables when Claire and Phil try to talk with her about her future; Jay receives news from his friend Shorty; Cam and Mitch go on a romantic date.
Claire and Phil spy on Luke and Manny; Jay misinterprets Gloria’s anger over a dream she thinks he had for another offense he committed; Mitch tries to keep a secret from Cam; Haley tries to keep her photography exhibit from her family.
Luke competes against the son of Phil’s nemesis (Rob Riggle) in a wrestling match; Cam and Mitch ask Claire to pick up Lily from school without mentioning the recent lice incidence in her class; Gloria chaperones a field trip.
Cameron feels competitive when a popular teacher returns from sabbatical; Haley goes to a realtor’s banquet with Phil; Mitch struggles to get his bearings at his new job; Jay and Gloria babysit Lily.
Jay takes Luke to the garage for some male bonding; Gloria and Claire take Lily dress shopping; Mitch, Cam, Alex and Manny spend a day at the museum; Phil helps Andy make an anniversary gift for his girlfriend.
Jay is determined to get the adults’ hotel suite upgraded; Claire tries to win back some money; Phil auditions to be a magician.
Mitch struggles to hide his genuine feelings about an unflattering wedding topper Cam’s father made; Phil tries to help Gloria sell the apartment she had before Jay but they get sidetracked at a salon; Jay wants to host a nice family evening.
The family joins Phil as he travels to Australia to fulfill his mother’s wish that he see the land where he was conceived.
Phil cannot handle the stress when he tells Claire an elaborate lie; Gloria is tasked with organizing this year’s family portrait; Jay covertly enters Stella in a dog show.
Jay, Gloria and Manny challenge one another to try something new; Mitch and Cam sell a couple of their prized possessions to fund the wedding; the kids play a joke on Phil and Claire.
Mitch and Cam’s big day is finally here and nothing can ruin it, until nothing turns into a whole lot of somethings and puts wedding planner extraordinaire Pepper Saltzman to the test. Jay and Gloria host the Tuckers, Phil squeezes in an eye procedure before the festivities and Claire embraces her role as 'best woman'.
The wedding day chaos continues as the entire party shifts from one contingency plan to another. Guests start to get testy, Mitchell and Cameron are feeling discouraged, and poor Claire shows physical wear and tear.
Jay forces the family to take their family vacation on a houseboat on a lake. Mitchell runs into an old flame and opens some old wounds. Cam has to stay out of the sun at all costs. Phil and Claire try out some adventureous excursions. The kids’ quest for a good time may not be as fun as they expected.
Phil and Claire realize that Alex may be more self-sufficient in college than they thought. Manny works to avoid a tearful goodbye after Gloria and Jay move him into his dorm. Hayley gets an unexpected opportunity.
Phil thinks he’s going to have a day of bad luck after he doesn’t complete his daily superstition. Mitch believes Cam is undermining him during their kitchen renovation.
Jay’s best friend, Shorty, is back from Costa Rica but spends more time with Gloria than Jay. Alex is ready to shed her good-girl image and is going to prove to Claire that her relationship with Ben is definitely a sexual one.
Phil and Claire still want to celebrate Halloween in a big way, but no one shares their enthusiasm. Mitch and Cam are frustrated by how long Jay is taking to finish their kitchen remodel. Gloria’s hospitality is wearing thin when Cam oversteps his boundaries as a house guest.
Claire is determined to make up for her less-than-joyful mood at Jay and Gloria’s wedding by throwing their tenth-anniversary party.
During Jay’s Thanksgiving toast, he honors the entire family on their recent successes, even though everyone knows that isn’t quite true. As everyone desperately tries to hide the facts about their perceived triumphs, Phil works hard to master a classic magic trick and prove he’s not the family failure.
The family recount all their biggest celebrity encounters; Phil shows a house to his musical hero; Jay’s day at jury duty takes an unexpected turn; Manny’s encounter with his favorite playwright doesn’t go as expected.
After leaving his real estate firm to strike out on his own, Phil decides a solo camping trip in the wild will be just what he needs to boost his confidence; Mitchell’s plan to teach Cam and Lily each a lesson backfires.
When Claire lands a big opportunity for Pritchett’s Closets, Jay expects validation for his contribution. Pam’s ex-boyfriend shows up and Mitchell sees this as an opportunity to get Pam out of the house. Luke and Alex find a business opportunity.
Claire’s request to build a “She Shed” in their backyard is denied by the homeowners association. Pameron lets Cam in on a family secret that forces him to visit Mitch’s therapist to work through this new information.
Gloria has to rush Phil to the hospital for an emergency surgery after he experiences some intense stomach pains and rallies the entire family to be by his side.
Luke goes missing after a night out in a sketchy neighborhood. Haley is desperate to land an interview with the creator of a popular lifestyle website.
Phil thinks that Gloria is upset at Jay for dropping the ball on Valentine’s Day, so he convinces Jay to spice things up with a little role playing that doesn’t go off as planned. Mitch and Cam may have unwittingly ruined Luke’s Valentine’s Day date and are forced to make things right.
When Jay overhears Gloria on the phone talking about spanking, he assumes she is frustrated in the bedroom. Now that Mitchell has an amazing new job, he and Cam throw a party to rub it in Cam’s friends’ faces so they can no longer give him “the look of pity.”
The family goes on a wine-tasting trip and stays in Haley’s new boss’ country house where the only rule is: Don’t touch the tiara. Gloria and Mitch are invited to a party at Oprah’s house but can’t bring anyone else.
Haley’s brilliant astrophysicist boyfriend and Alex’s simple but heroic fireman hunk meet the family. Jay and Gloria meet Joe’s pal’s perfect parents. On couples retreat, an isolation tank traumatizes Mitch and Cam meets his baseball idol.
When Jorge, Gloria’s ex-boyfriend, stops by for a visit, his resemblance to Manny makes Jay question Manny’s paternity. Phil agonizes over the perfect gift for Claire for the anniversary. Cam and Mitch deal with Lily’s women’s troubles.
When Haley hears that her loopy boss is looking for a product with the magical properties of peppers, she tries to gain favor by convincing Gloria to sell her salsa to NERP. Mitchell gets Cam the police ride-along he’s always dreamed of. Also, Phil and Claire compete against one another while Luke has a meeting with a dean of university.
When Dede drops in unexpectedly, Mitchell and Cam come to a realization about her effect on their lives. Phil, Luke, Alex and Haley all have different bad news to break to Claire and compete about when to do it.
Haley meets Arvin’s parents but when things don’t go as planned, fate leads to an unexpected reunion with all of her ex-boyfriends. Meanwhile, the family seizes on a nursing home visit with Jay’s mean sister, Becky, to settle old scores. But as Jay, Claire and Mitchell compete for her time, Phil, Cam and Gloria end up getting trapped in the home’s basement with no way out.
Mitchell sneaks out to “Hero-Con” with fanboy Phil, dressed as their favorite characters from the show “Clash of Swords.” It’s great until Phil commits the ultimate fan faux pas. In a clash of another kind, Gloria’s dinosaur party for Joe is ruined when her nemesis, Dr. Donna Duncan, upstages her with a far bigger and better party right next door.
After recent trips take the Dunphys to New York, Mitch, Cam, and Lily to the Midwest, and Jay, Gloria, Manny, and Joe to Juarez, Mexico, the Pritchett-Dunphy-Tucker clan reunites.
A new family moves in across the street from the Pritchetts and Jay wants to make a good impression. Manny hopes his deeds will catch the attention of a pretty teenage radical. The Dunphys try to look on the bright side of Alex’s bout with mono. Mitch and Cam are shocked to overhear Lily disrespect a new friend.
Luke and Manny go head-to-head in a race to be class president, but the campaign might be more of a battle between their parents. Phil introduces Haley to a marketing genius to help with her promotion business. Cam goes to extremes to keep his best football player from leaving the school.
Phil can’t cover up his excitement when he’s invited to appear in a real-estate news segment for the local news. The day gets even better after meeting his “weatherman” hero, Rainer Shine. Phil made one little mistake; he introduced him to Hayley. Over at the Pritchett house, Jay decides to infuse a little grit into Manny’s video interview for his college application. In the Tucker-Pritchett home, Lily is over their new houseguest and decides to take matters into her own hands.
Luke hosts a Halloween party that quickly turns into a nightmare, so the Dunphys come up with a plan to make it a success and rescue his reputation. Cam confronts his holiday nemesis, but Mitch and Lily try to keep him from going overboard. Jay plots revenge on an old adversary when he finds out where Manny is going to a party.
Jay’s only sanctuary and favorite place in the world begins to lose its charm when Phil starts to think about becoming a member. Claire misjudges her influence over Alex’s choices. Hayley wants to impress Alex with her life choices.
Cameron spares no expense for his Thanksgiving jamboree. Hayley tells Phil she’d rather spend the holiday with her new boyfriend. Jay works to keep his blood pressure down. Alex and Dwight get closer.
Hayley’s plan for a fun-filled girl’s day with Rainer Shine’s teen daughter may be a little more angst-filled than expected. Luke finds himself in a compromising position with a widow at the club and unwittingly helps Jay with his petition. Gloria, Phil and Cam have formed a secret alliance to ensure their respective “mistakes” are concealed from their spouses.
A fancy holiday gala at school finds Manny and Luke trying to avoid a disastrous outcome thanks to a texting mistake. Eager to pitch in, Claire, Gloria, Mitchell and Cameron volunteer to help at the dance and get involved in the night’s shenanigans, including Claire and Gloria trying to set up a single mom with the principal, while Mitchell takes an interest in the school bully.
Trying to recover from his Thanksgiving debacle, Cam decides to treat the family to a New Year’s Day feast. After realizing that Cam’s recent attempt is also a complete fail and in order to salvage their meal, Mitch uses a “concierge gift card” that he received as a Christmas gift. Cam soon discovers that the concierge who is on his way to save the day is none other than his ex-boyfriend, Keift, a former circus ringmaster who left him without saying goodbye. Meanwhile, Phil’s dad, Frank arrives with his new girlfriend, who happens to be Phil’s childhood babysitter, which sets him on a confusing tailspin. Finally, Gloria and Jay have to decide who should take care of little Joe if something should ever happen to them.
Cam is upset about a rude parent that cost him a precious moment during Lily’s dance recital. During a visit to Alex’s coffee shop with Hayley, Cam believes he has spotted the anonymous parent and goes to extreme lengths to verify.
Fearful that the romance between him and Claire is fizzling, Phil calls upon his alter ego, Clive Bixby, get Valentines day back on track. Jay shows a bit of child favoritism when he and Gloria must deal with Joe’s inappropriate Valentine gift-giving and Manny’s dating indecisiveness. When Cam and Mitch try to empower Lily, Haley and Sal to stand up to the men in their lives, things don’t turn out as planned and go overboard. Alex discovers she has a secret admirer who may be a little too involved with family.
Phil eyes a property he’s always had a desire to develop and wants Jay to be a coinvestor. Claire’s fondness for a TV chef leads to a new love of cooking Sunday dinners. Mitch and Cam try to teach Lily the value of hard work. Jay feels left out when Gloria hires a coach for Joe who doubles as a handyman.
Despite their lofty hopes, Phil and Jay’s property investment might turn out to be a bust, forcing Phil to rethink his original dream. Meanwhile, Cam lands in the hospital due to a head injury and refuses to have an MRI thanks to a traumatic incident with a well when he was a child. Determined to finally impress Claire and keep her from re-gifting her birthday present, Gloria surprises her with a day of luxury at the office. However, after Claire had to implement some rather harsh budget cuts at work, a massage at her desk may not be sending the right message.
Cam is enraged when he receives an online video showing someone has been desecrating his beloved Fizbo costume, which sets him on a quest to restore Fizbo’s good name. Phil is in for quite the surprise when he finally meets his new soon-to-be step-brother at Frank’s bachelor party. Manny’s newest play hits a little too close to home for Gloria, Claire, and Haley when he enlists them to do a read through before he submits it to a young playwright festival.
After choking at last year’s charity basketball game, Phil has been training all year to redeem himself. However, when NBA stars Charles Barkley and DeAndre Jordan attend the game and start making bets, Phil tries to not buckle under the pressure. Gloria has to step-up at Manny’s school when her nemesis, Donna Duncan, tries to shame her for her lack of support at the school. Claire does whatever it takes to keep a work mistake secret from Jay, while Jay’s concerned that Joe doesn’t have a healthy fear of him at all.
Mitchell knocks over an urn filled with the ashes of Cameron’s beloved pet pig Lilly while exercising in the garage, but Cameron suspects his cover-up is a load of hogwash.
Mitch and Cam have five minutes to catch a new flight while fighting the effects of sleeping pills they took prematurely. Then at Rainer’s birthday dinner, Haley and Rainer are forced to reevaluate their entire relationship in the five minutes before the birthday cake arrives. Phil and Claire pay a surprise visit to Alex and are given a five-minute surprise introduction to her new boyfriend. With only five minutes to catch a movie, Manny has to find the perfect parking space and endure Jay and Gloria’s backseat argument.
Frank Dunphy’s wedding has a Roaring ’20s theme, so Phil gets his clan to show up in costume, but Claire and the kids realize it’s time for an intervention with Phil when they’re the only ones who dressed up. Jay comes to regret mastering the art of saying “no”. Cam finally gets the courage to stand up to his sister Pam.
Gloria, Claire, Haley, Alex, Lily, Luke and Manny are equally committed to showing their support for gender equality and the women’s movement in very different ways. Meanwhile, Jay and Phil are at odds on how their parking lot attendant, Joan, should be running their lot, and jealousy ensues when Pam prefers Mitchell’s help over Cam’s with her baby.
Mitch and Jay end up at the same resort when they separately seek out a retreat from the family; Phil and Claire struggle to enjoy empty-nester life; not knowing what to do with himself while Mitch is away, Cam drops in on Gloria.
When Alex returns from a humanitarian trip, the family dynamic shifts; Cameron remains in a lovey-dovey mood even after the honeymoon ends; Gloria gives Jay a taste of his own medicine after noticing the lack of effort he puts into his appearance.
Jay and Gloria can’t agree on what kind of anniversary gifts they want to exchange; the Dunphys go with Alex to Caltech for her college tour; Mitch, Cam and Lily take a new family portrait.
Phil must make creative edits in Cam and Mitch’s wedding video when footage reveals that Phil is responsible for a terrible cold that has plagued the family; Gloria and Jay try to help Manny cope with stress in different ways.
The Dunphys stay in a cramped hotel room while the house is treated for mold; Gloria feels protective when Manny starts dating an older girl; Cameron wants to maintain his team’s winning streak but fears Mitchell is a jinx.
Phil is selling the house next door and he and Claire are excited by the prospect of having wonderful new neighbors, but that quickly turns into panic when a loud and obnoxious couple come to look at the house. Jay forbids Manny to see his new girlfriend when he realizes she’s the granddaughter of his biggest business rival. Mitch and Cam are determined to switch Lily out of Mrs. Plank’s class since she is known to rule with an iron fist – and she also scares them.
Claire allows Phil to take over Halloween this year, so he decides to turn the house into AwesomeLand. Cameron gets overwhelmed by the day’s activities. Mitchell has closing arguments for a huge case, and it doesn’t help that the stenographer is dressed like a spider.
Phil and Claire don’t know if they should be happy or concerned that Haley and Andy are spending a lot of time together, however, they soon find things are not what they appear. Gloria is pushing Manny to learn Spanish instead of French so she goes ahead and hires a Spanish tutor, Diego, who also happens to be very handsome, much to Manny and Jay’s chagrin. Meanwhile, Mitch and Cam meet a popular news reporter at a school function and one of them piques her journalistic interest.
Phil is cooking Thanksgiving dinner this year with Luke as his sous chef, and Claire has no confidence in them and prepares a secret turkey of her own as backup. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria had plans to spend the holiday away but when the trip gets canceled last minute, they decide not to tell anyone which quickly becomes the worst idea ever since the family dinner gets suddenly moved to their house and it turns into a mad scramble to cover their tracks. Mitch is tired of always being the bad cop so when Lily refuses to wear a nice dress to dinner, he forces Cameron to deal with it who then comes up with a very unconventional approach.
When Alex tells Phil and Claire she has a boyfriend, they worry they’ve put too much pressure on her and has made up an imaginary boyfriend. Jay and Gloria both have parties that they are dragging the other to and Jay has a clever plan to get himself out of it, but Manny just might spoil everything. Mitch and Cam just got a beautiful white couch delivered but when Mitch is stuck helping out Brenda, a distressed co-worker, and allows her to stay – it is a mishap waiting to happen.
Haley is turning twenty-one and the whole family is taking her to a bar to celebrate! Claire really wants Haley to start seeing her as a friend rather than her uptight mom, Mitch and Cam make the sad realization that they may not be as cool as they thought, and Phil and Jay’s quick pit stop to pick up Haley’s gift, a new car, becomes a disaster. Back at home, Alex, Luke and Manny babysit Lily and she decides to drop the ‘where do babies come from?’ bomb.
While driving out to get breakfast, the Dunphys plus Manny have a near death experience causing everyone to reevaluate their lives. Claire resolves to be more fun and less uptight, Haley and Alex agree not to fight anymore, Manny refuses to ever ride in a car again, Luke wants to check off his bucket list, Phil decides to be a take action type of guy, and the rest of the family has to bear the brunt of all the new attitudes.
Claire is furious about neighbors Ronnie and Amber’s eye-sore of a boat on their front lawn and it soon becomes an all-out war when Phil calls in the “big guns” as back up – his dad Frank and all his retired friends to give them a taste of their own medicine. Elsewhere, Jay is trying to potty train Joe but Gloria does not think he’s ready yet, and Cam secretly takes Lily to clown school behind Mitchell’s back.
Phil starts to feel the teenage cold shoulder from Luke and, with Andy hanging around a lot as his apprentice, he easily steps in as his new right hand man. Gloria and the doctors suspect that Joe might be allergic to Stella. Mitchell does some freelance legal work at Jay’s closet company and working with Claire becomes a very enlightening experience for the both of them.
Valentine’s Day means ’Juliana’ and ’Clive’ are back, but things get worrisome when Claire starts sensing Phil may be more into Juliana than her. Jay goes from feeling disappointed to scared when Gloria’s visiting sister becomes a larger deterrence for a romantic evening with Gloria than he thought. Mitchell and Cameron get themselves in a precarious situation with a good friend.
After a long reunion weekend with Phil’s old cheer buddies, Claire jumps at the chance to snag the only first class seat left on the return flight home, leaving Phil in coach. Gloria forces Jay to teach Manny how to defend himself against a bully in his cooking class, but when things backfire it seems that the real bully might be someone else. Mitch, Cameron, Pepper and the whole gang throw Sal a belated baby shower.
Claire’s computer becomes the hub of all the family’s activities when she gets stuck at the airport and is desperate to reach Haley after a big fight. After FaceTiming with Phil and the rest of the family to help track her down, Claire quickly turns to online snooping which inevitably becomes disturbing real quick and everyone gets sucked into the online drama.
Jay and Claire shoot a Pritchett Closets commercial. A drone is spying on Gloria. Lily prepares to perform in her school talent show. Haley’s feelings for Andy become even more complicated.
Spring break has Claire doing some spring cleaning, while Phil struggles with not being a spring chicken when Luke starts outperforming him at seemingly everything. Haley takes Alex to a music festival to take her mind off of colleges, and Gloria and Jay challenge one another to give up Spanish soap operas and cigars respectively. However, when Gloria accompanies Cameron to his faculty talent show, she projects the soapy drama she craves onto Cam’s rivalry with Senor Kaplan, and Jay tags along with Mitchell to pick up Lily from camp so he can sneak a smoke.
Jay’s birthday brings everyone together and Phil is beside himself over the super cool gift he got Jay, a high-tech outdoor grill. Claire and Mitch decide they will “offer” to pay back the money Jay loaned them ages ago as their gift not really thinking he will take them up on it, and Gloria teaches Manny and Luke a lesson about drinking, while Andy gets real awkward with Haley when she brings over her new doctor boyfriend.
Phil and Jay run an errand together to pick up Lily’s hand me down princess castle for Joe, both though are in a mood because Phil is upset that Claire won’t let him buy an arcade machine, and Jay thinks Gloria is letting Joe play with too many girlie items. Mitch and Cam babysit Joe and both get the itch for another baby – that is until Joe presents to be quite the handful! Meanwhile, Gloria tries to help Haley stand up for herself at work, and Claire tries to bribe Luke’s principal to give him one of the student awards this year.
Alex’s worst nightmare is realized when she gets news that she has to share the Valedictorian title with her number one competitor, Sanjay! Both sets of parents get equally caught up in the rivalry and convince Principal Brown to let them break the tie via a gym grade they both have not completed – a one mile run. Elsewhere, Gloria is studying for her upcoming U.S. citizenship test and a visit from Javier throws her off her game, and Mitch and Cam blindly agree to join a protest against a local restaurant that they are actually secretly excited about.
The family is determined to make Alex celebrate her senior ditch day and Phil, Luke and Haley forcefully take her out but end up at an unexpected detour. Claire is torn when she gets a job offer from a big hotel chain but feeling torn quickly gets replaced with feelings of confusion when she can’t tell whether or not Jay really cares if she stays or goes. And with Manny groggy off of pain killers from his wisdom teeth procedure, Gloria seizes the moment to put a sabotage plan into effect to break Manny and his new girlfriend up.
Jay agrees to sub in on Cam's bowling team, not knowing it's an all-gay league. Phil and Clair have an unexpectedly nice time with their neighbors. Gloria and Mitch agree to go out with Haley.
The whole family is at Jay & Gloria's for Alex's graduation party, except for Phil, who ingeniously figured out a way to be there via skype and a robotic vessel after being unexpectedly detained in Seattle on a business trip. During the celebration, Jay frets about Gloria's cousin who has overstayed his welcome, Claire stresses out about giving Alex the perfect gift, Mitch hides news of being laid off from Cam and Andy's girlfriend, Beth, is in town stirring up a whole lot tension with Haley which finally leads to a realization that may have come too late
The Pritchett-Dunphy-Tucker clan get together at the annual Fourth of July parade where Jay will be acting as the grand marshal. Haley's goodbye with Arvin before his trip to Switzerland doesn't go as well as she pictured it and is distracted by the return of an old flame.
Haley needs a little help deciding whether to tell Arvin about her kiss with Dylan and goes to Mitch and Cam for their advice. Gloria suspects Manny's Canadian girlfriend is made up and wants to find out the real truth.
Phil stumbles into an exciting new career after dropping by Luke’s college. Claire deals with her dad, Jay, and the merger of Pritchett’s Closets with a tech-savvy, hipper company. Mitch’s new high-profile case as an assistant district attorney is marred by an unflattering courtroom sketch by the resident artist.
Haley can’t seem to choose between her past and present relationships. Manny returns to college and dorm life while his girlfriend, Sherry, continues to stay at Jay and Gloria’s, and might be overstaying her welcome.
It’s another epic Halloween full of costumes, tricks and treats for the Dunphy-Pritchett-Tucker clan as they deal with huge, unexpected news.
Phil learns that his real estate class will be cancelled if any additional students drop it. Jay may unknowingly be flirting with the mother of Joe’s classmate and tries to set boundaries.
Cam decides he needs to reconnect with his country roots and get a chicken. Alex is up for a prestigious government job. Haley and Dylan think it might be time they grew up a little.
Haley needs a little motherly advice from Claire as she considers her future with Dylan and her career. Jay and Cam’s less-than-politically-correct coaching style earns them a class on sensitivity from Manny and Phil. Mitch runs into Phil’s nemesis, Gil, at an unlikely place.
Dede’s husband, Jerry, comes to town to bequeath her possessions to the family. Mitch and Claire receive a little more of Dede than they really know what to do with, and Jay and Gloria feel sorry for Jerry and invite him to stay with them while he is in town.
Hayley works to figure out the best time to give the family a Christmas gift they will never forget. Phil borrows the family Christmas tree for a house-showing. Jay, Gloria, and Joe deal with unwelcome holiday visitors.
Claire and Phil aren’t convinced that Haley and Dylan can make it on their own as they move them into their new apartment before the baby arrives. Pam gets out of prison early and has a bone to pick with Mitchell.
Phil and Claire decide to take a cycling tour through Italy. Cameron and Mitchell discover some interesting reading material in Lily’s room.
Cam must also contend with a bully at the school. Jay is has a little technical trouble during his video conference. The local mall holds a photo shoot for its new ad campaign and Gloria tricks Phil and Joe into participating.
Phil thinks he found Pepper his dream home. In an attempt to connect with Lily, Mitch and Cam get invited to an exclusive event for her favorite vlogger.
Jay hosts a Super Bowl party at his house while Claire hosts a baby shower for Haley.
Lily has reached a womanly milestone that Cam and Mitch are not prepared for – at all – so they call in reinforcements.
Mitch, Cam, and Phil crash Jay’s annual hiking trip to find an elusive bald eagle after Gloria asks them to keep an eye on him. Gloria, Alex, Claire, and Haley get together to plan her baby shower.
Dylan and Luke are really impressed with Bill’s tales of heroism and survival as a firefighter, which make Phil feel emasculated. To impress the guys, he invites them over for a little male-bonding moment that goes terribly wrong.
In an effort to be less negative, Claire is rebranding herself as the girl who says “yes” and inadvertently approves of Luke’s new relationship with someone from his work. Phil tries to surprise Alex at school right before she receives an award she didn’t tell him about.
Haley and Dylan’s plan to quietly elope before the babies are born doesn’t go as smoothly as they had hoped. Jay continues to try and get his new business off the ground by courting an Instagram celebrity.
Cam finally gets a chance to shine when he is asked to preside over the high school graduation ceremony at the last minute. Jay gives the commencement address. Claire runs into her former high school rival who brings out the worst in her.
Haley gets back together with Dylan. Alex and Sanjay plan their breakup since they are both going off to college. Mitchell avoids finding a new job and takes up art. Jay and Gloria try to find a good preschool for Joe.
Phil and Claire are hurt when Alex lies about her college move-in date and Luke doesn’t want to spend the day at Phil’s open house; being landlords stresses out Mitch and Cam.
Mitchell takes a job with a rival of Jay’s; Luke and Manny visit Alex but use the opportunity to meet girls; Gloria is upset when a cheerleader doesn’t decorate Manny’s locker; Phil and Claire try to play chicken when Dylan moves in.
Phil convinces Lily to help with hatch the ducks he made a habitat for; Claire wants to impress her father with some ideas she has for the business; Cam spends time bonding with the frat guys.
Gloria is excited at the possibility for being selected for jury duty; Claire brings Alex and Haley to work and hopes to impress them; Phil takes Manny and Luke’s class to community service day.
Phil is surprised by Claire’s reaction to Luke’s arrest; Mitchell helps Gloria figure out the secret to her family sauce recipe.
Phil is selling an upscale home where various members of the family sneak off for alone time.
Gloria wins a silent auction to have a therapist come for an afternoon with the adults; Haley and Alex consider dumping their boyfriends.
Gloria’s plans for a White Christmas don’t go as planned.
Haley, Alex and Luke scramble to fulfill their promise of a special day for Mitch; Gloria arranges a playdate with a couple at Joe’s school.
Claire and the kids seize an opportunity to help expedite the ducks leaving the nest while Phil is off visiting Alex at college. Jay helps Mitch with Lily’s sleepover with her friends from her Vietnamese dance troupe. Gloria and Cam are off on a hot pepper heist carefully orchestrated by Manny in order to meet a big hot sauce delivery deadline.
Claire decides to get rid of all of the clutter out of the house before taking over Jay’s business. Jay’s new hobby causes concern for Cameron.
Phil feels unappreciated as Claire is busy running the closet business. A life-size standee of Gloria for her hot sauce display receives some unsavory attention. Cam and Mitch feel suspicious of their new renters.
A powerful storm hits Los Angeles and causes widespread power outages, so the entire Pritchett clan hunkers down at Jay and Gloria’s house to use their generator. Meanwhile, Phil tries to make amends for an embarrassing moment, Mitchell and Cameron desperately try to save Lily’s birthday party, and Haley turns on her charm for Andy.
Jay and Gloria are suffering with a lack of sleep after Joe goes through a fussy phase. Claire’s balance of life and work is so flawless and easy that her family is getting suspicious. Mitchell and Cameron are poorly treated at their friends’ wedding and wonder what they did to deserve it.
Phil has a new client whom he tries to hide from his wife because she’s attractive, while Claire would rather keep her hot yoga instructor a secret. Jay becomes preoccupied making a Web show, but is tormented by an Internet troll. Lily is nervous about learning to ride a bicycle, and her parents aren’t exactly the best teachers.
Phil has the crazy idea of going on a spontaneous trip to Paris with Claire, the only problem is that they are both so ridiculously tired but try to push through it. Jay has taken over their bathroom remodel, which proves to be pretty hazardous for Gloria, Manny and Joe. Cameron’s sister Pam is staying at the house after her husband has left her, but her emotional outbursts are driving Mitchell crazy. Haley and Andy go on a wild night bender.
Manny and Luke babysit Lily so the adults in the family can have some fun, which includes Phil and Mitchell seeing a movie, Claire and Gloria going to a spa, and Jay and Cameron hitting a sports bar to watch a big fight, but Claire suspects the boys are going to throw a party.
Claire brings home a stray dog and gets the kids to help her hide it from Phil while she tries to find its owner. Unfortunately, her evasive behavior only makes Phil try even harder to shower her with more attention. Elsewhere, Gloria invites a new couple over even after Jay has made it clear he doesn’t want to make any new friends, but when the husband turns out to be a real guy’s guy, Jay might be eating crow. And Cameron rents out their upstairs apartment to a Christian rock band.
With Closet-Con right around the corner, Claire is on high alert and convinced there is a mole in the company. Meanwhile, Phil goes vigilante when he and Gloria confront Auntie Alice for stealing her hot sauce recipe. Jay tries to teach Joe how to do some manly handy work, and with prom coming up, Mitch helps Luke with his "promposal" while Cam helps with Manny's, but Cam goes a little overboard, revealing that there maybe something deeper going on.
Dede is getting remarried, and Manny convinces the family to take the train up to the wedding. Jay could not be more ecstatic that Dede has moved on for good but his overenthusiasm might come back and bite him later. Claire and Mitchell work on their toast while Phil and Cam geek out over their favorite author, who is also on the train. Luke and Manny go a little girl crazy, Gloria gets stuck in coach, and Alex gets caught up in the romance of the train herself.
Claire can’t seem to find the right time to fire one of her employees, while, back at home, Phil thinks he caught Luke with a girl in his bed, and no one seems to notice that Alex has moved back home for the summer. Jay refuses to accept that it might be harder to reenter the workforce than he thought, and Cameron and Mitch butt heads on how to share time with Lily now that Cameron took a summer job in Kansas City.